Hello Beat,
i know that this topic is not so easy, because I'm a tax auditor and an lawyer is also having an look on this topic for me.
and i had an look into the tax-plugin and i saw you had a lot of work to get this working for all these countries !!!
and germany is not the only country - but be sure the other countries that have the same consumer protection regulation - they will have the same problem
"put a disclaimer somewhere that your prices are with German VAT included, and that individual differing EU countries VAT will be computed at checkout."
is not an solution, you will definitly get an letter from an lawyer that you violate german law and we talking about 100 EUR up for each of this letter
deducting the VAT from the gross price is an solution which will fix this problem
and i think this could be implementet as an option
an other solution is to give an discount for B2C costumers to have the same gross price in invoice and before registration, but this is not working because you have to click twice on "save" button for the invoice - it seems that tax and promotions are not working in one step
i know this new eu-vat rule is not so easy to handle but i only try to help to find an solution
so sorry again if this sound not so friendly!!!
It is not my intention
by the way:
"easy for you to implement" was meant as a compliment